With The Dawn
by Kurissyma san Tybalt
Summary: No matter how insignificant we may appear, or how much we try to fight it, at some point we must all break the hearts of those we care about. Royai Deathfic
1. Riza Hawkeye

**AN.. This ficcy is dedicated to my friend Sophie-chan (aka imagining-dark-roses) for pushing me to finish this and for her help with the last chapter and the summary!! Hugs and Duckies, Rissy-chan****  
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**With The Dawn: Riza Hawkeye**

The day that Maes Hughes died had been a very painful one. The many that had loved and cherished him and held him so close to their hearts stood around his grave and wept for him, without exception. Even if they hadn't shed a single tear during the service, each and every person standing in the assembly that day returned at some point in the weeks that followed to be alone with their dear fallen comrade and to cry for the loss of him.

That day held a great amount of personal significance for Riza Hawkeye. It was the day that she made up her mind to die by her Colonel's side. It hadn't been the first time she'd ever been in a graveyard, but just seeing all of those nameless headstones, lost as they were in the sea of dull and lifeless grey and knowing that someday there would be graves enough that Hughes' would just be another one of those many- knowing that as time passed they may not even be able to _find_ the grave again… That was when she made her decision.

Now, on the morning of her lover's funeral, she had already made up her mind that she would not be in bodily attendance. Someday, his grave would just be another one in a million, but the day would never come where it was lost to her. She wouldn't let it.

Riza Hawkeye let out a sharp, harried breath as the cool metal of the gun brushed against her bare thigh and jolted her back into total awareness. The clock was ticking- she had to do this fast. She had to assert her right to a place at his side for all eternity before she lost him altogether.

Slowly, she slipped into the bath full of warm soothing water and felt her tense muscles immediately relax. Looking around her, she saw that all was in order and managed a weak smile. Her note of farewell and her will were on the white marble counter by the sink, kept securely weighted in place by a small vanilla-scented candle that she had lit just before climbing into the bath. Across it, she had strewn pale pink rose petals, fragrant and beautiful. It hardly seemed like the sort of place destined to become the state of a suicide, but chains and blood-splattered walls were hardly her style.

Laying back against the cool edge of the tub, Riza reached with one hand for a beautiful red stemless rose on the counter, just a little to her right. Cupping it in her hand securely, she trailed the familiar FN Model 1910 handgun down the valley between her supple white breasts, then, closing her eyes, she fired a single round into her chest and let the flower fall to rest on top.

The world seemed to stop spinning, but Riza refused to open her eyes and ruin her idyllic last sight of the perfect rose by seeing the dark blood that she could feel pouring down her chest into the warm bathwater around her.

Though the pain was great, she neither cried, nor screamed. She just kept her eyes squeezed tight shut and waited in agony for the rose pink colours of the coming dawn to set her flying on dreams unto the new day.

'_Soon.'_

She wasn't sure whether or not the word had actually come from her own lips, or from another's, or even if it were the pure product of her fevered imagination, all the same, she heard it and smiled.

"Soon," she breathed out in a choked reply, throat and jaw tight from pain.

'_I'll see you again.'_

"…Roy."


	2. Jean Havoc

**With The Dawn: Jean Havoc**

When he had awoken at six that morning, it had certainly seemed to Jean Havoc as though it would be a beautifully sunny day, but almost immediately after he stumbled out of the soft, warm confines of his tangled bed sheets, it began to pour. On a normal day, he might have jokingly accredited it to the Heavens protesting his awakening, but today was different. Today, he knew that the sky was crying for his fallen comrade. 

Still, he forced himself through his morning routine with the utmost diligence and determination. If not for Roy, and if not for himself, then he had to be there for Hawkeye. _'God knows how much pain she's in at this very moment,'_ he thought to himself miserably, without really knowing the half of it. _'And she won't have slept all night either, knowing her. Poor girl.'_

Around 9 o'clock Private First Class Sheska arrived on his doorstep, greeting him with a weak wave and a sad little smile. No words passed between them, but the sentiment was clear.

"Let's go," he forced himself to say eventually and she nodded, linking her arm with his anxiously and leading him out into the street.

It couldn't be helped- it was time.


	3. Gracia Hughes

With the Dawn: Gracia Hughes 

The ceremony was an absolutely beautiful one. It wasn't just a fitting farewell for a high-ranking military officer; it was special- a truly unique service that was absolutely perfect in every way for the sort of man that the Colonel was.

It was a great shame that Ms Hughes found herself completely unable to pay attention. She would have found it most comforting, as did all those who did manage to maintain concentration throughout the procedure. Gracia herself spent the entire time fidgeting and looking around in such obvious discomfort that her own small daughter twice asked her whom she was looking for in the large crowd- who else ought to be there that wasn't. It shouldn't have surprised her, given the father, that her daughter was so perceptive, but it always did.

"Your Aunt Riza hasn't turned up yet," she whispered back the second time she was asked this, but she would say no more.

Gracia Hughes was afraid. She knew the sort of woman that Riza was and she knew how very dear the Colonel had been to her, indeed, she was one of an extremely select group of people who knew anything at all about the truth of the two officers' very physical relationship, and that scared her. That Riza wasn't here to see him go… it just wasn't right.

"It's okay, Mommy," Elysia whispered with a little sniffle. "We'll go and visit her after we say goodbye to Uncle Roy. She'll be happy to see us."

It really amazed Gracia Hughes just how quickly her young daughter had matured. She was, in every possible way, her father's daughter and it made her smile to think that some of his character, if only just a little, had been reborn in her- the product of their love.

"Yes, we'll visit afterwards," Gracia agreed, smiling down at her daughter in her little black frock. "After we say goodbye." Consequently, she leaned down to kiss her daughter's forehead and smooth out her fluffy brown hair before looking back up, finally able to watch the beautiful ceremony in peace.


	4. Winry Rockbell

With The Dawn: Winry Rockbell 

Winry was worried. Standing by Ms Hughes, she had heard all that had transgressed between the young woman and her daughter and found herself equally worried by her absence. As much as she tried to watch the ceremony, she found that she could not. When it came down to it, she knew that Roy Mustang really had been a good man, working for the betterment of the nation. Though at first she had rightly despised him, in his death she found herself able to attest to the goodness of his character. Despite this, it had been Riza Hawkeye who had befriended her as a child and always been kind to her and comforted her. She too, knew of the Lieutenant's love for her superior officer and she was afraid.

'_There is someone I need to protect. It was not because I was forced by anyone, but it was my own free will. It is my own choice to pull the trigger for the person I must protect. Until the day that person accomplishes his goal… I will pull the trigger without doubt.'_

He was her _raison d'etre: _the one thing that gave meaning and purpose to her life and the justification for every major decision she had made since… well, childhood.

It worried her that Riza Hawkeye would not be there to see him off- worried her greatly. But while the service was still in progress, there was naught she could do. It would be a great disrespect to leave now.

Anxiously, Winry waited the ceremony out, even managing to cry a little near the end, before turning back to Gracia, who was looking just as upset as she.

'Riza?' she saw her mouth as a couple of the men drifted over to join them but she could only shrug in reply.


	5. Private Sheska

With the Dawn: Sheska 

"Guys…" came Havoc's poor attempt at a steady tone as he approached Fuery and Falman with his girlfriend of two weeks, Sheska, the Bookworm. "You haven't seen Hawkeye yet, have you?"

The two men turned to face them tiredly.

"…No," Falman replied eventually. "We haven't seen her."

"She probably wants to be alone," Fuery murmured, his voice quavering slightly as he said this.

"Nobody wants to be alone," Sheska admonished him softly. "We should really find her…"

Neither Fuery nor Falman replied.

"Will you help Jean and I look?" she asked, linking her arm with Havoc's and smiling weakly. "Nobody says so but they're all thinking about her- they're all really worried."

Fuery glanced at Havoc meaningfully. "Jean," he said, his voice nothing more than a breathy whisper and his eyes dull and tired.

Havoc crunched down hard on the handful of nuts in his mouth and nodded in grim understanding. "Come on, Sheska. I'll take you home."

Sheska looked from Havoc to Fuery to Falman and then back again. "No…" she whispered, eyes filling with tears in less than half of an instant as she understood. "No," she repeated determinedly, clutching onto Havoc's arm a little tighter as her legs threatened to give out from beneath her. "She-she can't be-? You can't mean-?"

"I think so," Fuery whispered. "She returned Hayate to me last night, even though she knows that I can't take care of him… She said that she just couldn't anymore and I think she…I'm sorry, I didn't know how to stop her. She was just so-"

"It's alright," Sheska cut in after a while, saving the poor boy from his miserable attempt at an explanation. "I understand. There was probably nothing that you could say… Nothing that would have changed anything." She smiled weakly here. "You know how stubborn she always was."

"…She wouldn't have wanted to be apart from him," Havoc agreed, his voice choked slightly by a tight throat.

"Now they'll never be apart from each other again," Sheska whispered. "They'll be together forever now…"


	6. Edward and Alphonse

**With the Dawn: Edward and Alphone Elric**

"That bastard…" Edward muttered to himself hotly. "How could he go and do this and leave the Lieutenant alone like that?!"

This earned him a hard knock with Winry's wrench. "Insensitive jerk!"

"Hey! I'm _totally_ sensitive!!" Ed protested, rubbing his sore head defensively. "I was thinking about the Lieutenant!!"

"Do you think he wanted to leave her?! Honestly, you can't even be polite about the Colonel in his death!!"

"Brother! Winry! Stop fighting!" Al pleaded, waving his arms quickly as Ed and Winry glared at each other. "This is a funeral!!"

"Whatever," Winry huffed, folding her arms. "I'm going to see Riza."

Ed watched her go, glaring determinedly, but sighed and drooped as soon as she was out of sight. "I didn't wanna see the Colonel die, Al," he admitted tiredly. "He was an idiot, but he was a good guy, and the Lieutenant really loved him."

"He loved her too, Brother," said Al quietly. "He didn't want to hurt her at all- that was the last thing he wanted!"

"Yeah, I know… but it's just so much easier to blame him."

"…"

"…We should go too," Ed sighed. "We have a train to catch in a couple of hours."

"Shouldn't we see the Lieutenant first too?" asked Al worriedly.

"Do you think it'd actually help? You know how she hates people seeing her in her moments of weakness- we'll come back and see her soon, on a better day."

"You're right, brother," Al agreed thankfully. "Let's go back to Risembool."


	7. Denny and Maria

With the Dawn: Maria Ross and Denny Brosh 

"Leaving already, Edward?"

"Oh, Lieutenant…" said Ed, looking up as Maria Ross approached with her partner, Denn Brosh. "Yeah, we're going, but we'll be back in a month or two to see how Hawkeye's going,"

"That's awfully kind of you," said Maria, and if Ed caught the note of badly forced pleasantness and calm in her voice, then he didn't comment on it.

"How about you?" asked Al politely.

"Well, after the attack on Colonel Mustang, Major Armstrong decided that it was necessary for us to accompany you once again. If you're leaving, then so are we," Maria explained.

"Uhh… yeah, Major Armstrong," Denny agreed quickly, shooting Maria a confused glance. "If you'll just give us a minute…"

"Sure," said Ed, and Denny dragged Maria aside.

"Why did you say that?" he asked, glancing over at Ed and Al furtively. "You know that Hawkeye's gone and Armstrong never asked us to watch them again!"

"Well it's true that it's dangerous for them to be out and… and what was I supposed to say, Denny?"

"I understand…" he agreed regretfully. "But I rather wish that Havoc hadn't told us either… You and her were very close, weren't you?"

Maria nodded silently. "Yeah, we were… I just hope she's happy."

"And Ed…?"

"…Will have to be told before he goes back to Central, I suppose."

Denny sighed quietly, lifting up a hand to uncharacteristically ruffle his superior's cute and fluffy boy-cut brown hair. "It's the Lieutenant Colonel all over again, isn't it…?"

"Yeah, it is… but it's worse this time."

"Worse?" Denny repeated. "How?"

"Well Roy and Riza were like parents to those kids," said Maria sadly. "Not in the affectionate way that our parents were, but they were still there for them, and they loved them…"

"You're right… Are you sure we shouldn't tell them?"

"I'm sure," Maria decided. "We'll wait until the mess here in Central has been sorted out and then we'll call them back."

Miserably, the two of them proceeded out of the graveyard. Neither spoke of it any further but together, they began a slow trail towards Hawkeye's home. Unpleasant as it may be, she could not left waiting long.


	8. General Grumman

With the Dawn: Lieutenant General Grumman 

He was a good man, Roy Mustang.

He could have been a great alchemist.

He could have been Fuhrer and made a difference in the world.

He could have married Riza Hawkeye and had many, many children…

…And he could have been happy.

But no.

Grumman bowed his head reverently before glancing over at his wife beside him. Aylin Grumman was crying softly. The boy had been as good as her grandson, after all. "Come now, Aylin- Let us see if we can find Riza in the crowd…" About halfway through that sentence, he seemed to realise the idiocy of his statement.

Of course, Riza wasn't there. Immediately his heart sank and he walked back over to Roy's grave, signalling for his wife to stay a moment. Bending down on one knee, he sighed and pressed a hand against the broken earth sadly.

"This is where you want to be, isn't it, Riza?" he asked himself softly. "It won't be long, I promise." A hand on his shoulder jolted Grumman to his feet. "Ayli-!"

"Our Riza's not here, is she?" she asked quietly,

"No… Not yet," Grumman agreed reluctantly.

"Poor, poor girl… At least she'll be happy with him," Aylin murmured, squeezing her husband's shoulder comfortingly.

A small smile flickered over Grumman's face at that. "No chance of great-grandchildren now."

"Afraid not, darling," Aylin agreed. "But she had a good life with that man…"

"General, sir!!"

"Winry-chan, isn't it?" asked Grumman, turning around, suddenly the picture of military courtesy and etiquette.

"Have you seen Lieutenant Hawkeye? I'm really worried-" Winry cut herself off at the look on his face. "Oh… She's here," she said eventually.

"Here?" asked Aylin softly, not even daring to hope that her granddaughter was still around.

"With him," Grumman agreed, a hand falling to clasp his dear wife's with a sad smile as the three of them stared down at the fresh grave. "Yes. She's here."


	9. Elysia Hughes

With the Dawn: Elysia Hughes Elysia's POV 

"Riza?? Riza, are you in there?!"

Mummy's scared. I can see it in her face and in her voice. I'm scared too. I want to see Aunty Riza!!

"Riza??"

Mummy's pulled out the key she has for Aunty Riza's house. Her hand is jiggling and I have to take the key and do it for her. I know how. It was the same after Daddy went away.

She stumbles into the room. Clumsy Mummy. I hold my hand out to help her but she doesn't see it. She jus' keeps walking in.

Clumsy Mummy. She almost knocked that over…

"Elysia-chan, will you help me look for your Aunt Riza?" she asks eventually.

"She might be sleeping?" I said helpfully and she nodded.

"I'll check her bedroom."

Mummy left, still looking kinda confused and not concentrating and I went to look around. I was scared but I didn't want Mummy to worry.

I looked in every room I could think but no Aunty Riza. I passed Mummy once and she was shaking like she was really, really scared… But Aunty Riza is safe here, right? Nobody can hurt her in her own house.

"Elysia-chan, please check the bathroom… I'm going to call Riza's grandparents, and then Maria. Maybe they've seen her."

I rush off to check the only room we haven't looked in yet and breath out a sigh of relief. There she is. That's why she can't hear us. She's fallen asleep in the bathtub.

Smiling.

And her bubblebath is all pink! Though I guess the bubbles are gone. I put my hand in and the water is cold- she's been in here too long and her skin has gotten all pruned up too. The flowers are pretty, though…

There's a note on the counter so I take it to Mummy without reading it. I can't read Aunty Riza's writing anyway.

Mummy reads the letter with a straight face at first but at the end she is crying. She asks me if I've read it and I crawl into her lap on the couch, saying that I didn't. She just hugs me sadly.

Sadly…

…But Aunty Riza was smiling, right?

"Mummy, she's okay. Don't cry," I say softly, reaching up and stroking her hair like she does to me when I have a nightmare. "She's in the bathtub, sleeping. Just fine, I promise!!"

She doesn't answer because she's crying too hard.

"Mummy!" I beg. "Mummy, don't cry!! I'll wake her up for you if you want. Just don't cry!!"

Mummy grabs my arm as I go to leave and it hurts. Her hand is so tight on my arm!!

"Mummy!!" I cry.

Yeah, I'm crying too now. Something's wrong. I really want to go and get Aunty Riza for Mummy. She can make us tea and biscuits like always. Aunty Riza has lots of tea in her cupboard. Maybe if I could reach…

"Elysia-chan, don't go in there again," she says and I climb back into her lap and look up at her.

"Mummy?" I ask.

Mummy lets go of my arm and shakes her head. "I'm going to make another call okay, Elysia-chan. Stay in here- I'll be in your Aunty Riza's room."

She left then and I sat on the couch by myself but it was lonely and I was scared. Mummy knew that Aunty Riza was okay but she was still so sad… I couldn't read the letter so I decided to go back to see her and ask.

"Aunty Riza?" I said, knocking on the door, but she was still sleeping so I just went in… even though Mummy told me not to. "Aunty Riza?" I said again. I could hear the sacredness in my voice. Why wasn't anybody telling me anything? "Aunt-"

"Oh, Elysia-chan!!"

Aunty Maria, Uncle Denny and Mummy were at the door. I was scared that Mummy would be mad but she just looked upset. I don't know which was worse…

"I'll take Elysia-chan away so you can set things into order," she said softly. "The General and his wife will be here soon.

"Mummy, are you mad at Aunty Riza for sleeping through Uncle Roy's funeral?" I asked worriedly. "She was sad. She didn't mean to-!"

"I know, darling," Mummy said, bending down to look at me properly for the first time.

"Mummy?" I said.

"I'm not mad at Aunty Riza, I promise." Mummy turned my hand over in hers and tickled the palm absently. "She was just… too in love with him."

I didn't know what she meant but I was glad that Mummy wasn't mad. Aunty Riza would be all right and Mummy would be all right and everything would be okay.

Everything would be okay…

It couldn't rain forever.


	10. Roy and Riza: At Last

With the Dawn: Riza Hawkeye and Roy Mustang 

An idyllic green countryside, perfect blue sky, and two young children running around, playing by the river… That was the sight that awaited Riza Hawkeye when she opened her eyes. A hand over her face to shield her eyes from the bright sun, she sat up slowly, squinting down at the little blond girl and her dark haired friend- the two children who so absolutely resembled herself and her lover as children.

The grass besides her rustled slightly and Riza felt a hand cover hers, followed by a soft, sad chuckle. "I'd like to say that I was glad to see you here, but…"

"Where are we?" asked Riza softly, not needing to turn her head to know who it was that was beside her.

"Memories," Roy replied quietly, indicating the children just a little way away. "I've been playing them over so much recently…"

"I'm sorry that I couldn't protect you. I'm sorry that we're here."

Roy shook his head firmly. "No… The happiest days of my life were spent by your side, my love, and there is no way that I'd rather spend my death." Riza turned her head to finally look at him, cynicism in her eyes. "My only regret is that… What you did for me, that is my one regret."

Riza leaned over to kiss him softly. "I could never regret that," she promised.

Roy bowed his head slightly. "All the same, I am sorry," he replied solemnly.

A few minutes passed in silence as the two of them watched their past selves down by the lake by Riza's father's old home. It may have only been an illusion, but it was comfort, all the same.

"…You know, Roy, I'm done being sorry," Riza decided eventually, squeezing Roy's hand in her own and smiling at him encouragingly. "We have forever now and I will love you longer. Hell to the rain. Hell to the _past_." She thrust her hand, and Roy's too, out towards the lake. "It's done to death and all that exists for us is _right now_.

"I love you."

-

**Fin**


End file.
